Self Care Like The Queen of Swords

This Queen is about clear thinking and intellect. She knows exactly how to get what she wants and what to do to get it. She is the most obvious leader of all the queens. People look to her because of her no nonsense approach. She has seen it all and calmly can address any situation. She is well practiced in maintaining composure no matter what. She is ruthlessly independent and almost brutally honest. She is pretty much the opposite of the Queen of Cups. When it comes to self-care, this queen is the one that gets us off of our coach, out of our pity party and on with the task at hand. Her way of caring is about getting the mindset up to par with what needs to be done.

The Queen of Swords intuits through her mind. Her intuition speaks to her through her logic and through her calm mind. She realizes that she can pretty much achieve anything she wants with the right mindset. Therefore she is very careful with the words she says to herself and her thoughts. She is also very careful before acting, but she is definitely not one to drown in overthinking either. She appears stern looking directly at the task at hand. Like the bird above her, she lets nonsense thinking fly away, including any doubts that she can do what she sets out to do. The sword remains ready to act and to slice through any obstacles. Notice what could be meditation beads on her wrist. You can bet she is a practiced meditator. The clouds on her robe and in the background can signify her ability to think her way through any mess. 

queen of swords


Keywords: Communication, Authenticity, Expression

Location in the Body: Throat

Color: Blue

Mantra: HUM (To be said out loud to open up this Chakra)

Crystals to use: Aquamarine, Lapis Lazuli, Turquoise, Blue Lace Agate Smells: Nag Champa, Thyme, Geranium, Coriander

Flowers and Herbs: Sage, Rosemary, Marshmallow Root, Slippery Elm

Foods: Blueberries, Plums, Elderberries, Purple Cabbage, Lemons

THROAT CHAKRA I associate the Throat Chakra with the Queen of Swords because the Throat Chakra is the source of authenticity, truth and communication. The Queen of Swords is authentic in her words and her actions. The Throat Chakra is how we communicate our beliefs. It showcases the integration of our mind and body. The Throat Chakra allows us to speak our truth and if it is balanced, without too much fear. The Throat Chakra relies on the integration of the rest of our chakras. This is why this Chakra is often out of alignment.

We can either be too closed or too open. When we are too closed, we fear speaking our truth and do not live authentically in the world. When we are too open, we are not careful with our speech, only reacting and not checking in and noticing what we really want to say. In both cases it is a matter of mindset. The Queen of Swords knows when to speak and what to say. She doesn’t fear, nor does she speak without care. Everything she says and expresses is based on lots of inner work. Self care and self love work become evident in our expression.


Keywords: Vision, Clear Thought, Self-Reflection, Noticing

Location in the Body: Between the brows

Color: Indigo

Mantra: AUM (OM) (To be said out loud to open up this Chakra)

Crystals to use: Amethyst, Black Obsidian, Purple Fluorite, Indigo Kyanite

Smells: Frankincense, Patchouli, Vevitir, Palo Santo, Lavender

Flowers and Herbs: Mugwort, Valerian, Poppy Seed, Rosemary

Foods: Red Cabbage, Berries, Grapes, Chocolate, Red Wine, Caffeine

I associate the Third Eye with the Queen of Swords because the Third Eye Chakra is about clear vision and clear mind. The Third Eye unites the left and right brain, the masculine and the feminine, the good and the bad. While the Queen of Swords is solid in her truth, she sees the middle, all truths. All truths are true as long as they are rooted in integrity. The Third Eye integrates. The Third Eye shows us our right, our wrong, our morals, our ethics, our search for justice. The Queen of Swords understands a lot about the world and a lot about herself by being silent and becoming an observer. She even becomes observer of her own thoughts. She examines them without personal emotional attachment. She meditates them. Simple silent meditation is the best way to engage with the Third Eye. Becoming an observer of our thoughts liberates us from limitations and teaches us truth upon truth. The Third Eye is the guide we constantly seek, but lives right there within us.


According to Abraham Maslow’s hierarchy of needs theory after all other needs are met, one can reach fulfillment. While I think that self-care is pretty circular versus non-linear, it would make sense that this is an ideal place to aim for. Being self-actualized is doing everything you are capable of in the best way you can in the current moment. It’s being content with where you are growth wise and it’s knowing you are doing your best. Hopefully we have all felt that at least once. Hopefully we feel this way often. We all have bad days where we need to focus on our body and do something as simple as rest. On those days, your self-actualization may look a little different then on days when you are kicking and slaying goals. They are both more than ok. Self-Actualization is not a one stop destination. Rather I see it as being at home in your body, mind, spirit. It’s knowing what you need that day and it’s knowing what you are capable of giving that day. All selfcare is on a continuum and relies on us truly checking in and knowing ourselves. SelfActualization is intuitive self-care actualized. It’s doing our best today and then again tomorrow.

We will be doing a workshop called Actualizing Your Ideas in Healing Party. Join this free group if you want in on that. The recording will be available!

Self Care Like The Queen of Wands

The Queen of Wands with her gut full of fire runs toward her creativity and passion. Confident and courageous, she will enact whatever she dreams up regardless of what is stacked against her. One might ask what creativity has to do with self care, especially they are under the misguided notion that they are not creative. What does this have to do with you? 

We are ALL creative.

ALL of us.

It is what makes us human…to create.

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Self Care Like The Queen of Cups

She intuites things and doesn’t feel like she has to explain her why. Her heart knows. She is gentle with herself and with others, but her boundaries are strong. She is the queen that shows us how to truly care for ourselves.  She never rushes and she never stifles. All emotions are roads to truth.

The Queen of Cups is a teacher and leader of emotions and intuition. When we look at this Queen of Cups we can see her feet not quiet touching the water but she may let it wash over her with no worries. She does not force her environment, but lives at one with it The element associated with her is water and the flow of life is something she is in tune with always. She is aware of her needs and finds her way through introspection.

She does not look ahead or out, but in.

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Self-Care Like the Queen of Pentacles

She is always aware of her needs and gently holds them in her sight.

She is not one to wonder why she is so tired or irritable or feel like a mess because she is always checking in with her needs, knowing they can change day to day. She also doesn’t appear to look guilty for resting in her garden to take a moment to think about what she needs. I mean what queen would feel guilty about that?

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Self-Care for The Chariot

Life is without meaning. You bring the meaning to it. The meaning of life is whatever you ascribe it to be. Being alive is the meaning.
— Joseph Campbell

When I was in maybe 3rd or 4th grade, I got a perservence award. I mean they weren't wrong...I have always been one to stubbornly work hard no matter what the obstacle. I worked hard in hopes that I would erase the poverty I was living in, that I would get out of the little town my mom had moved us to, and to surpass my disempowerment. I silently had my goals and dreams and was relentless to pursue them but all the while the feeling was to be more so I can finally accept myself. I didn't care too much about being accepted, even in middle school or high school. I always felt really odd anyway, so my motivation accepting this, was very much and internal drive. 

The Chariot is a card that visualizes this internal drive. Despite any obstacle the Chraiotteer moves forward. The Charioteer has the wand, the power to control the next movement.  The Charioteer has the tenacity to create what they wish. The confusion I have had most of my life is that one is to try to move forward and forward despite what it does. 

Seeking power can disempower.

The Chariot contains both light and dark, devil and god, ugly and beautiful. The Charioteer integrates and balances the two. The Charioteer are intuitively guided and while the will is there, so is the pausing to listen to all parts of self and to move forward from that place.

It's more of a methodical moving forward than a hurried one like you might see in a knight. It's Durga methodically killing off demons with full composure versus Kali indiscriminately ripping apart everything and getting drunk of demon's blood. Durga and Kali and the same being though and the Chariot, though I would associate with more calm and composed energy may have both energies residing at any or all times. The key is that The Charioteer can balance and master all to make it for them. 

Seeking power of self through integration and balance is empowerment.

The Chariot

 The Chariot from Motherpeace

The Chariot from Motherpeace

Element: Water

Number: Seven

Chakras: Third Eye and Crown

Mantras for The Chariot:


Use following spread with tarot or oracle cards and/or use them as journaling prompts:

If you need any assistance determining what goals to focus on in the next year I have a Tarot Reading for the Year ahead for the beginning of the year or on your birthday! Check out my options here!



Self-Care for The Hermit

Being "on" all the time, filtering myself into digestible being on these platforms is exhausting. Don't you feel it sometimes? And again the benefits of the internet are great! I have met people that have changed my life as far away as Australia. I mean that's pretty damn cool. I got a lot out of my in person connections in my younger years too, but I also intuitively knew when to take a break. The winter is a great time to withdraw. I plan on focusing on my in person relationships even more and maybe even having a weekly day of solitude. Maybe some of you want to join me? Maybe I'll make it a challenge. :)

So this is what The Hermit is all about...withdrawing to learn more about herself; to find peace; to rest; to get back on track. Solitude. It make The Hermit a better teacher and leader to withdraw to others and a leader of her own life. 

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Self-Care for Temperance

I talk a lot about shadow work, a lot of us reader healer types it’s so easy and not complex at all, but oh it is. There are ugly parts of me that I’ve had to comes to terms with but there is a danger to avoid that those parts of me exist or existed. Avoidance and pretending that we have transcended our ugliness stalls our growth and makes us fall into perfectionism and perfectionism freezes us. So I have found that the most important thing I can do is integrate these parts of myself.

Do I contradict myself? Very well then I contradict myself. I am large and I contain multitudes.
— Walt Whitman

Identity is something that it is so tempting to hold onto a little to tight. With white knuckles we grip so tightly onto an identity because it is our foundation and when we do something at odds with this proclaimed identity, our foundations shifts below us. That is never a good feeling. So it becomes a practice to notice our behaviors and to examine them as an outsider. I'll give you an embarassing example I have been an angry person...a very angry person in my life. Anger is something that I rarely show but it's there. I'm the kind of person that watches Democracy Now and yells at people on the screen. (Hence...why I no longer watch much of it...I don't want to scare my toddler)  I am also the kind of person that used to get angry over my plans not going my way or that my partner forgot to put flea medicine on our fur babies. Now as I work as a healer, spiritual type person I am like "oh I musn't get angry" There is a shadow side of my anger for sure, but the anger also shows how passionate I am. It shows how important justice is to me. I just have to pick my battles concoiously. I am not all love and light all the time. Sometimes I am thorns and screaming. It's all me. So that is what I mean by integration. Transmuting something shameful into something that can be used as a tool. But also allowing the screams, the hideous to surface in ways that heal you.  


Some will say that Santosha: Contentment, an Niyama in the Pantajali's Yoga Sutras is to approach everything with positivity and yeah to a certain extent...yes, but again it's a fine line between that and avoidance. So contentment to me is about acceptance . It's about finding peace with whatever is happening and being ok about it. It's letting whatever must surface, surface. Santosha is being completely satisfied now. It's looking at all your debt and accepting it, paying it off as you can. It's looking at your toddlers wet shirt that you just changed and just changing the shirt. Santosha. It's a gratitude practice. What is going well? What is happening NOW? It's refusing to be a victim to what is and instead become a hacker of your destiny. What can you do now? Maybe accept it for now. Victim mentality is dangerous because it keeps you stuck. I mean how can you move forward if "everything is working against you" sheesh...

This is what Temperance is to me. It's the divine internal balance. It's balancing ourselves and finding harmony with the ugly, the beautiful and the wants, the needs and the haves. Temperance is there to remind us of our complexities and of our depths. It's about finding flow in the midst of chaos and being Santosha. And the thing is the more you overthink it, the more out of balance you become. It's like dancing or riding a bike. It's like anything you have to find flow with. 

Just be.


Temperance from Motherpeace

Element: Fire

Number: Fourteen

Chakras: Root and Crown

Mantras for Temperance:

Use following spread with tarot or oracle cards and/or use them as journaling prompts:

Tarot Spread for Temperance

If you would like extra assistance with integration, I offer tarot rituals, yoga and reiki sessions online or in person in Kansas City! Check it out

Self-Care for The High Priestess

The High Priestess is the gate keeper. She is you giving you access to all the knowledge that is kept deep inside. If you allow yourself to look behind the curtain, if you give yourself permission, what could happen? You can get help from us teachers, guides, healers, but you know what...we are only there to support you. The true wisdom...that's all you. I say in my readings often...that YOU KNOW...because you do. All that wisdom is there for you to access and sure you may not know now, but acting on what pieces you know liberates more wisdom. Are you brave enough to ask her, to ask you wha you truly want?

“I believe in intuitions and inspirations...I sometimes FEEL that I am right. I do not KNOW that I am.” 
― Albert Einstein

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Self Care for The Star

Me too. The gravity, the importance and the life altering power of these two words cannot be overestimated. When I typed them I realized it was almost easy because it felt like another person had been through the things that came into my mind so I am revisting my suffering...more on that in another post. Then I read all the other Me Toos and I was horrified. My heart broke knowing that so many people I admire and love have also been harmed. How many of us have kept quiet and brushed it off as just being part of what our lives is? Anyone who is non-white, non-gender conforming, non-hetero has felt this pain. It becomes part of life.

This is not ok.

As we share that we too have endured suffering and pain, we are healing the collective. Vulnerability is not easy. Every week I struggle for a bit, wanting to puke after I share so deeply. I share though because I feel like our stories can be powerful to heal the collective. Healing happens both inside of the island of ourselves, but also by us pouring forth what we have learned from the time on our island. Feelings of isolation are dangerous and only reinforce shame. Sharing our stories (even saying Me Too) is taking power away from that shame.

I’ve also been reflecting on what healing is and the power dynamics of healing. There is this idea that healing is all on the individual. If you would just try harder, you too could be healed. We forget, I forget, that suffering is systemic. There is much stacked against us, some of us more so than others. So healing must happen in the collective. It must happen with activism. Healing happens in the uncomfortable, in the muck, the ick. The manufacturing of love and light as the only way to healing is dangerous. It is dangerous even to make love and light our goal. We are complex beings made of both darkness and light. We are hell and we are heaven. It is human.

“Love and Light is meaningless without Truth and Justice” Layla Saad from Wild Mystic Woman

I come to you as a wounded healer, a teacher not because you can’t heal yourself. I feel like it is my role to guide you to your own wisdom. I cannot help but to teach. I heal myself by teaching. It is my part of the healing the collective.

This week we examine the Star and we examine healing. As you can see the topic is complex.

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Self-Care for The Devil

I guess this is where I tell you about my struggles with addiction. I mean it had to come up sometime right? Sometimes we imagine addicts Trainspotting style...sweaty, shaking for their next whatever, but addiction comes in so many forms. The root of addiction to me is a lack of control over one’s life. It’s when you have no will of your own and do what your addiction has you do. I’ve been addicted to many things in my life...alcohol, shitty relationships, perfectionism. Addiction doesn’t start with addiction though. It’s starts with a choice to abandon all. It’s a choice to surrender to what will entrap us. Each time I became addicted to something, to someone, I felt that small sliver of a moment when I had a choice to get out and I stayed. The Devil is about being stuck, feeling trapped, and not knowing that there is a way out. To me it’s about that small choice though...that sliver of time before you are fully addicted. Once fully addicted and you make a pact with whatever devil you are involved with and it can be very difficult to get out. Studies even tell us that one can literally not help themselves once addicted so it really isn’t that easy to stop behavior.

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Self-Care for The Wheel of Fortune

Right now many of us are feeling the wheel of fortune...well disfortune in our home country. The United States is seemingly full of violence and chaos. Hurricanes and fires rip through homes. It all seems hopeless. It seems like we are spinning around this wheel, being tossed around a sea of what’s next. Am I going to fill this space speaking to you with words of hope? I wish I could do that so easily. I’m feeling just as hopeless and doomed as you are in this moment. I’m thinking of this word “hope” I used to roll my eyes at such things I saw engraved in stones or on t shirts. What the hell is there to be hopeful about? So I dug into definitions and found one that is sort of helping me...hope is a feeling of in a trust in oneself...of one’s divinity. Hope is to intend if possible to do something.

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Self-Care for The Empress

The Empress is this bold fertility. She is the mother. She is beautiful and everything she touches grows to its best capacity. She is mother earth. She is what blooms around you, what you taste, smell, see, hear and feel. She is the nurturer of all creatures. She nurtures with ease and enjoys with ease. She is not afraid to be seen. She is life itself. She asks you to accept miracles and the divine even if you can’t explain it. She doesn’t ask what you’ve done to earn abundance. She instead asks you to live to what you truly your greatest creative potential. She doesn’t ask us all to bear children or to paint beautiful pictures, but she does ask us to all create. She asks us as if it is our payment to live on the earth and in community. She asks what do you want to create? Why don’t you create it?

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Self Care for The Moon

You are the MOON. You are both tame and you are primal. You are dark and you are light. You must contain both to be YOU. It is time to dig into the darkness, into the subconscious of your mind and to purposefully seek discomfort in order to find freedom. Your ultimate goal is to seek, to understand and to find harmony within your multitudes of self. It will not be easy but you can do it.

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Self-Care for The Magician

You are the Magician. You have taken time to gain knowledge and become wise to the ways of the world. You have balanced the spiritual realms and the physical realms. You see no difference. As above so below.  You are never lacking the tools you need to get what you want done because you can use anything. You are a master at making whatever you have magical. You are aware of your skills, your talents and your resources. You use them to do your best work by bringing what in unconscious, conscious.

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